Venting About My Past, Present, and Future

Everyone eventually comes to one point in their life. They realize they are unhappy. This happens with everyone. If it doesn't, then that more than likely means they're a drugged out mentally empty living pile of flesh and bones, or someone who will inevitably do absolutely nothing with their life and eventually end up living on the streets sucking cock for food money.

I came to this point about a year ago. I was 16. I realized I was terribly unhappy with the way my life was going. I wanted things. Things to make me happy. Things I had no money to buy. Sure, I could ask my mom for 5 bucks to get a value meal at McDonald's, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the beginning of my adult life. The prelude. The pain everyone goes through before they jump into this fucked place.

I realized what I needed was a job. After looking, trying, and filling out applications for about 7 months, I was finally able to land a job at Winn-Dixie. My brother had connections there and I got hooked in. 2 Months later, I find myself with a 2000 Hyundai Accent GL, a brand new 17 inch iMac G4, and I'm working about 2 days a week, making around 60 bucks a week. For those who don't know, this fucking sucks. I'm in financial hell already, and I'm not even 18.

I don't care as much as I should though. I don't let the stress bother me. I can't. Stress kills, ask any doctor. This is the guy who had an ulcer at age 12. So, that makes me well qualified to simply say 'Fuck stress'. I got what I want. The 3 main things I wanted were this car I have, this computer I have, and a Gothic Gibson Les Paul then I don't have... yet.

But no matter how hard I try, the stress still gets me. It's not enough. These things I acquire to bring me happiness, it's not enough. I know what I really want. I want success. I want recognition for the skills and over all creative genius that I know is in me. I will have it. This will one day fuel these things that make me happy. These cars, these computers, and these guitars.

I don't want one car. I don't want one computer, and I don't want one guitar. I want as many as I want. I want the ability to see something and buy it without worrying. I will have this ability one day. It's simply impossible for me not to have it. Failing at this just isn't built into me. I've known this since I can remember. Maybe that fucking Richie Rich movie I watched as a kid brain washed me. Or maybe it was that one where that kid gets the blank check. Either way, success shall be mine. The Sick will go on to bigger and better things. Working at Winn-Dixie is the prelude to my success. Everyone has to start low. If you don't, then you'll be out of touch. Everyone will know my name one day. For those reading now, consider yourselves lucky. Remember the name, remember the words, and watch the transition. I'm 17, I'm a metal kid/entrepreneur/web designer/graphics artist/musician/writer. Think about. I've still got another 60 years to live. I've really accomplished so much in 17 years, and most of it isn't even documented anywhere on this website. Is it possible that I won't be successful in life? I think not.